As you know, much is being made of the global warming crisis threatening our very existence. Talk about it is so pervasive in the media that it’s depressing us all. But as you also know, your pal Al is all about looking at the upside of any problem. With that in mind, let’s take a look at some possible upbeat headlines from the year 2100, when global warming is predicted to make the world almost uninhabitable:
1. Californians hail no longer being under threat of “falling into the ocean” as state is now under the ocean.
2. Michael Moore III documentary, “Fahrenheit 7 Million” wins top prize at Cannes.
3. Egg industry booming as expression “so hot you could fry an egg on the pavement” becomes reality.
4. Movie sequel to “Some Like It Hot” called “Who Likes It Hot?” wins Oscar.
5. Snowbirds stop driving to Florida…. country saving billions of barrels of oil.
6. Jurassic Park sequels now shot in the wild without need of expensive animatronics.
7. Toyota announces the 7th generation of hybrid car to be half sun panels and half sails.
8. Movie critics guild recants its ‘worst movie ever award’ for Kevin Costner’s 1995 epic ‘Waterworld’, calling it “a movie ahead of its time!”
9. Stress of staying “fashionable” evaporates as clothes are no longer needed.
10. Al Gore IV wins Nobel prize for championing impending Global Cooling problem.
11. Obnoxious top ten lists now legally considered federal offense. FBI looking for help on whereabouts of blogger known as “Big Al.”